Big companies act like big companies. We don’t take them seriously when they say they care, because there is no “they.” When they send a holiday card or an email, we don’t really think it was from a person we could connect with.
Individuals act like individuals. When they write us a note or show up in person, we know that we’re dealing with a human.
In between, though, problems arise.
Did your friend really write that tweet, or did the staff do it?
That email that you just got, BCC… when you hit reply, will it go to the person who purported to send it, or to a team, or the infinite void?
The voice in our head changes when the identity of the sender differs.
When individuals try to scale, they often think they can bring their care, personality and person-hood along for the ride. And inevitably, it ends up disappointing everyone. It’s possible you can trick us for a while, but if you succeed in persuading us that you’re a real person, we’ll feel tricked sooner or later.
If it’s not from you, say so.
October 12, 2022
I’m not sure we have a common word for this.
“Yes” can mean, “yes, I’m prepared to do the minimum” or it could mean, “yes, this commitment is something I wholeheartedly embrace and will devote myself to exceeding expectations at every turn.”
Life’s way better if we find partnerships that are the second kind.
“All in” is rare, but it actually means something.
October 11, 2022
Satisfaction is often driven by the story we tell ourselves.
How does this rank compared to what I expected? Compared to what I used to have? Compared to the person sitting next to me?
The richest person in the world used to sleep on the floor and eat moldy food, but still felt great because it was more than the person in the next cave.
The good news is that our perception of comparison is up to us.
October 10, 2022
The optic nerve dominates.
It’s piped directly into our brains and uses a lot of processing power to help us discern the world through vision.
As a result, it’s louder than our other senses and often outshouts the rest of our brain. That’s why it’s easy to be fooled by a magician.
This focus on sight means that we often are at a loss on how to deal with things that are invisible.
It works in our favor with the placebo effect. We can see that we just swallowed a pill, or wore a brace, or bought an expensive bottle of wine. That input helps us heal or enjoy the moment, even if the organic invisible things behind the scenes don’t quite match what we saw.
And it works against us when it’s time for our community to process things that are invisible over time (like evolution or systems change) or invisible in the moment (like viruses and greenhouse gasses).
When there’s a conflict between what we know and what we see, we often default to the wrong one.
October 9, 2022
The closer we look at what other people believe and do, the more clear it is that our view of the world doesn’t precisely match theirs.
It never has, but now it’s magnified. The things we thought were a given, aren’t. No one believes what I believe, not exactly.
How is it possible, we wonder, that people like us don’t believe what we believe or do what we do? Not just people we don’t know, but the people we do know.
And how do we dig in to overcome magnified divisions to find shared objectives, to fight for justice and dignity and what’s right at the same time we connect with people we might be inclined to push away…
Simply asking the question helps us find a way forward. Realizing that people don’t know what we know, don’t believe what we believe. And most of all, that they have a noise in their head, just as we do.
October 8, 2022
You might want to make something that a lot of people want a little…
Or you could make something that a few people want a lot.
It’s usually neither.
It’s rarely (very rarely) both.
If you work hard and make intentional choices, though, you might end up with one or the other.
October 7, 2022
The phone in your pocket cost $600, but that was two years ago, so now, it seems to be free and fully paid for.
The upgrade has a slightly better camera and a slightly faster processor.
Here’s the question: “If you could have chosen between the phone you have now and the phone you want now two years ago, would you have paid $700 more for the newer one?”
Most people would not.
So why do we upgrade? Software, phones, cars, houses…
It’s because we’re not making that simple choice. Instead, we’re embracing the wisdom of the choice we made years ago at the same time we’re focusing on the glaring defects that status and affiliation relentlessly point out.
They’re not trying to sell you a phone any longer. Or a house. They’re spending all their time selling you an upgrade.
October 6, 2022
If, every time there’s a dish in the sink, you load and run the dishwasher and scrub the entire kitchen, you’re never going to get anything else done.
On the other hand, if you wait until the sink is overflowing and the kitchen is filthy before you work on it, you’re going to spend a lot of time living with a dirty kitchen.
Somewhere in between the two extremes is a productive steady state.
The same goes for your relationship with a customer, your staffing decisions and just about everything else we do all day. Setting the triggers for action is best done in advance, and maintained regularly. Waiting for a crisis is expensive and risky.
October 5, 2022
What do the dishwashers eat for lunch?
What’s the user experience of accounts payable for that big tech company?
How does the head of sales treat the receptionist?
If it’s good enough for your customers, it should be good enough for your team, your vendors and your friends. And vice versa.
The key is this: In many organizations, customers have a choice and customers have a voice. Treating everyone as if they have that sort of power makes it far more likely you’re earning trust and respect, not cutting corners.
October 4, 2022
This common question no longer means anything.
Every TV show is on. All the time.
Our record collection streams every record ever recorded.
And our readers can find and display just about any book we can name.
We haven’t thought about the impacts of this abundance nearly as much as it deserves. Live matters less, scarcity is not really a factor, and ubiquity of access can easily lead to boredom, lack of status and a search for real-time connection.
Success used to be based on gatekeepers and access to access. What are the new rules?
October 3, 2022
